Places I Have Lived

  1. Braemore Road, Hove, England
  2. Capel Avenue, Peacehaven, England
  3. Valence Gardens, Hove, England
  4. Adelaide Crescent, Hove, England
  5. Palmeira Square, Hove, England
  6. Castletown, Upper Beeding, England
  7. Sackville Road, Hove, England
  8. Sompting Abbotts, Nr. Lancing, England
  9. Northcommon Road, Wivelsfield Green, England
  10. St.Leonards, Sydney, Australia
  11. Hurstpierpoint College, Nr. Hassocks, England
  12. Grand Avenue, Hove, England
  13. Tisbury Road, Hove, England
  14. Wilbury Grove, Hove, England
  15. Pool Valley, Brighton, England
  16. Arlington Villas, Clifton, Bristol, England
  17. Gloucester Street, Clifton, Bristol, England
  18. Cotham Hill, Cotham, Bristol, England
  19. Quentin Road, Blackheath, London, England
  20. Fulham Road, Fulham, London, England
  21. Marischal Road, Lewisham, London, England
  22. Kings Avenue, Clapham, London, England
  23. Marcus Street, Wandsworth, London, England
  24. Basrah International Airport, Iraq
  25. Bath, various, England
  26. Mortlake High Street, Mortlake, London, England
  27. Milk Yard, Wapping, London, England
  28. Roman Road, Bow, London, England
  29. Belmont Park Avenue, Maidenhead, England
  30. High Street, Wargrave, Berkshire, England
  31. Rose Street, Wokingham, England
  32. High Street, Hornsey, London, England
  33. Seymour Road, Hampton Wick, Surrey, England

Countries I Have Visited

Is the UK one or four countries; what happens to countries like Hong Kong that no longer exist as they were; what is the definitive way of ‘covering’ (mustn’t say ‘doing’) a country, etc.? In rough chronological order.

  1. UK (England, Scotland, Northern Ireland and Wales)
  2. Portugal
  3. France
  4. Spain
  5. Singapore
  6. Belgium
  7. Greece
  8. Cyprus
  9. Luxembourg
  10. Germany
  11. Austria
  12. Turkey
  13. Iran
  14. Iraq
  15. Jamaica
  16. Kuwait
  17. Pakistan
  18. India
  19. Nepal
  20. Thailand
  21. Malaysia
  22. Indonesia
  23. Australia
  24. New Zealand
  25. Fiji
  26. USA
  27. China (including HKSAR)
  28. Macao
  29. Czech Republic
  30. Denmark
  31. Taiwan
  32. Italy
  33. Vatican City
  34. Sweden
  35. Hungary
  36. U.A.E.
  37. Sri Lanka
  38. Poland
  39. Slovakia
  40. Namibia
  41. South Africa
  42. Ireland
  43. Cuba
  44. Slovenia
  45. Croatia
  46. Tanzania
  47. Bulgaria
  48. Serbia
  49. Trinidad & Tobago
  50. Saint Lucia
  51. Barbados
  52. Brazil
  53. Jordan
  54. Israel
  55. Japan
  56. Montenegro
  57. Morocco
  58. Andorra
  59. Ukraine
  60. Netherlands
  61. Iceland
  62. Liechtenstein
  63. Switzerland

[Last updated: 16.08.2016]

Room 101

I’ve never claimed to be the most tolerant of people. The following things persistently get my goat.

Last update: 07.03.2009.

  1. Small talk. Say something worthwhile or enjoy the silence
  2. ‘Child on Board’ signs in cars
  3. Why say “haitch” instead of “aitch”?
  4. Why say “almonds” without a silent ‘l’?
  5. Why be offended by swear words? They are only words
  6. Why say “expresso” instead of “espresso”?
  7. Whistling. Wolf whistles are ok as there’s a purpose to them; but aimless, tuneless whistling is unfathomable
  8. Those who feed pigeons, therefore keeping the varmint populous. Ken was right there too
  9. Those who use an acronym regularly without taking the time to find out what they stand for. Top tip: Acronym Finder
  10. Those who ask the time whilst they’re sittng in front of their computer – it’s right there in front of you
  11. People who ask bone questions. Top tip: Google
  12. People who use cutlery knives as if they’re some kind of writing implement. For some obscure reason this group of people always think they have impeccable table manners
  13. People who drive slowly. Especially those who hang behind me when I’m cycling because they can’t work out the dimensions of their car
  14. Push-chairs in non-push chair areas. They get in the way, they’re lazy and carrying the baby is better for you both
  15. Dummies/ pacifiers
  16. Sandwiches cut at right angles
  17. Sultanas/ currants in savoury food
  18. Western beggars. Stop kidding yourself. There’s no excuse. Get a job. And a haircut
  19. Waiters who persistently try and take the chutneys away at Indian restaurants. I need them for the duration of my meal
  20. And waiters who take plates away while other people are still eating
  21. People who talk during movies, home or cinema
  22. The Mail and The Express newspapers and their circulation
  23. Bitten or badly cut nails
  24. George W. Bush, obviously
  25. Obese people
  26. Obese pets
  27. People who don’t cross out the completed words’ clues when doing crosswords
  28. People who put burnt matchsticks back in the box…
  29. …or sweet wrappers back in the packet
  30. People who aren’t forthcoming in getting their round in. You know who you are
  31. The speed of the average pedestrian
  32. People who are obsessed with writing lists. Clever hey
  33. Mariah Carey
  34. Men who tuck their ties in
  35. Tie clips
  36. Short sleeved office shirts
  37. Women doing their make-up or brushing their hair in public, surely it kind of defeats the purpose
  38. People who put their feet on your bar-stool
  39. Grubby mitts on my monitor
  40. Eating with your mouth open
  41. People in suits AND trainers. It looks ridiculous
  42. Pen-clickers
  43. Pen/pencil-biters
  44. Eamon Holmes
  45. Vanessa Feltz
  46. Angela Rippon
  47. Andie MacDowell
  48. Electric hand-driers
  49. Big Brother
  50. The outrageous wastage inherent to the civil service
  51. Heat, Closer, Hello, OK and Now magazines
  52. Doggy-doo-doos left anywhere that the public might go
  53. ‘Ms’. Get off the fence
  54. Women who try to conceal their year of birth.
  55. Short-sleeved work shirts
  56. The modern version of R’n’B
  57. Fake ‘smarties’ on gingerbreadmen
  58. Comic Sans
  59. People who pull the hand-brake on without depressing the button
  60. Middle England(ers)
  61. Richard Hammond

Fitness Wake Up Call

A good weekend stuck in a room with my new best friends. Will be an interesting development, how we mould together.

Got a really good email from a friend out there right now, letting me know a little how things are and what to bear in mind. Will certainly take it all on board.

2nd Monday night phys session, very good, more cobwebs cleared but still a bloody long way to go.

About to meet Roques. Have to avoid a pub apparently. Fair enough.

James Killian Spratt

Hi, James Spratt!!

This is James Spratt!! I’m a sculptor, living in western North Carolina, USA; I’ve just been online about 4 months, ain’t it great! I’m a cousin of John Spratt, SC senator, an acquaintance of Charles Spratt, canuck artist (and I do like his style), and proprietor of www.sprattart.com, my newish and still-a-buildin’ website. Say, what’s your middle name?
Funny story: three pals of mine and I are on a Harley rally in Sturgis, South Dakota. I sign us up for a table in a restaurant and step out to wait. The girl yells “Spratt, party of TWO!” so I turn round to correct her, to meet James Spratt, from Oregon, and his new bride, on their honeymoon. Lots of “Gee, whizzing and laughs all around. Small world, huh. Wanna bet there’re 2.4 million James Spratts in the world? Only the census bureau knows for sure, har-de-har-har!! Nicetameetcha, gimme an email.

Yours, James (snicker!) Spratt

jspratt at cytechusa dot com